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Sunday, April 6th, 2003
1:22 pm
Note on the mission... Reason why I wasn't as affected with Air Supply- I wasn't wearing any of those cheap beads. Finally, there's going to be an end to this strange mission -_- Which seemed more like a vacation to me. How sad that I'd consider such an idle mission in a different country a "vacation".

Note on Weiss... Everyone seems to be... Not quite themselves. I would want to say that it's because none of them want to leave and go back to Japan, because they've been having the time of their lives here... But I don't think that's it. Hmm. As long as none of them are going to get themselves killed, I guess, and they don't let anything personal get in the way of things.

Note on Schwarz... I don't know what they're up to, really. I don't care as long as they're not causing us any problems. It's just strange they're around here all of a sudden.

Note on myself... not much on that one. Dead skin is peeling off my arms from the sunburn. Oh well.

current mood: thoughtful

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Monday, March 31st, 2003
9:42 pm
Grr. I spent the whole time the other night trying to keep self-control, staying at my post and not going over to strangle Youji. Given the mission was a bit boring for most of the night... -_- The psychic woman didn't try and escape the hospital in the middle of the night. I guess if she's really psychic, she would kind of know that there's this two men who kills for a living want to get to her.

And then Omi didn't come back to the hotel room last night-- Ken was worrying like crazy, thinking that Omi was killed or something. We searched around for awhile, but we didn't find him. I wasn't too worried... we didn't find a body, and we're usually good at that-- I figured, Omi had a reason for disappearing...

I was just coming out to get lunch earlier today when I ran into him. He was... a mess, and I stared at him incredulously as he tried to reassure me that he was fine. I ordered him to get back in his room, clean up, get some rest... what the hell was that kid up to? I don't know what he's trying to do to himself, anymore, really... Pulling stunts like that can harm him more than anything.

I think we're getting off track with this mission though. I don't know how the psychic woman's really going to help us. Also spotted members of Schwarz purchasing Air Supply CDs... now that's highly.......... weird. Just weird. Are they doing their own investigations? Are they in on the conspiracy? Are they part of this whole thing, somehow? Or do they just like the music, like everyone else?

Also, why is everyone so affected by Air Supply, but I've been listening to them as much but I don't feel any difference. I don't hate the music as much as I used to, but I'm not obsessively replaying it, either. Maybe it is affecting me but at a much slower pace... did I just say I don't mind the music as much anymore?

current mood: pensive

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Saturday, March 29th, 2003
8:31 pm - Damn.
I wore a sleeveless shirt today and in my hurry to get out, I forgot sunblock.

Now, the upper half of my arms are roasted.

Grr.

current mood: uncomfortable

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Friday, March 28th, 2003
6:44 pm - Hmm...
This mission is starting to make me worry.

Apparently, Persia now wants us to collect him.... really ugly looking tacky beads. They hurt my eyes and EVERYONE has them on-- am I the only one that's seeing this?! I almost want to suspect someone's using those damned beads to try and blind people. jeezus.

My teammates are extremely... influenced by this mission, too. Ken was parading around in makeup. I did a double take when I first saw him, passing by me. I wanted to ask him what the hell is he doing.

Is it safe to assume that half of them has been brainwashed already? -_-

This is starting to get out of hand.

Youji keeps trying to flirt with me, still, and I really don't know why.

But I can't think about that now.

I visited Manx to clarify some things... She was in her room, stuffing two more sacks with beads. She said they were going out after dinner to get some more, and she invited me to come along. Eh. I suppose I might as well. She seem to know what she's doing with this bead things. I don't. I don't think I can just rip them off people's hands--- I've seen that crowd... they get fucking vicious, and most of them are wasted beyond recovery. I haven't seen the other guys around, anyways...

current mood: weird

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Saturday, March 22nd, 2003
12:05 am
As much as I am fully dedicated to each mission assigned to the team... this one might actually start to bore me.

All right. So Air Supply makes its listener act bizarre. Got that. They have parties in cemetaries and get high--- or is that a normal thing among teenagers here? I'm not sure. If it is... I fear the youth.

Yohji and I spent our time hanging around record stores and asking the locals about Air Supply. They give us the same answers. Pretty much that they like the music because it's "cool". Right. On a side note, most fans do not have a very huge list of adjectives in their vocabulary.

We're all watching Omi closely, though. He's in the age range where there are more fans of the music. He's slightly more vulnerable to whatever the music does to affect its victims.

Yohji's been acting slightly different, too... We both know the reason for it, I guess.

current mood: tired

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Wednesday, March 19th, 2003
9:00 pm
[private entry]

I feel ridiculous, trying to avoid Youji all day-- not looking at him, not meeting his eye, etc. I... let him kiss me last night. I wasn't taking in any drugs or anymore alcohol, and I was completely sober. I was just standing there and he sauntered over to me... pressed his body up against mine, then kissed me.

And I let him.

Until I got ahold of myself again, and so I pushed him away from me.

I'm angry at myself, for loosing control, for allowing him to do that.

Ken, Omi, and Youji are all important people to me. They are my teammates and they are the people I trust the most in this world. I do care about each of them, even if I don't show it all the time. I care enough to hold myself back from getting involved with any of them... because I don't deserve it...

Damn. I don't even really know what Youji really wants from me-- a lover? sex? It doesn't matter, either way... He needs to find someone else who can take care of him, make him happy.

I suppose the best thing to do now is just try and pretend it never happened. It'll just blow over.

But enough of that.

The mission is... getting there. Still listening to Air Supply music almost at a 24/7 basis. Haven't noticed any weird effects on me... No urges to act like an idiot in any cemetaries or anything like Omi's new "friends"... I hope Omi and Ken extract some helpful information out of these kids, soon.

current mood: weird
Tuesday, March 18th, 2003
8:53 pm - The sun is my enemy.
I hate going out when it's too hot-- and it's definetely too hot around here. Hmm.. my skin is starting too itch from too much sun. I'm going to get sunburned, soon... I tried to wear as much clothing that would cover my skin when I'm out... Damn. I might have to take Youji's advice and invest on some suntan lotion. What an annoyance.

Does any music from this country fall under the category of 'good'?

If I don't hear an Air Supply song after this mission for the rest of my life, I will die happy.

I asked Manx and Birman if we could get a rented car. Walking isn't covering too much ground around here.

current mood: annoyed

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Monday, March 17th, 2003
9:56 pm
I spent half the day trying to recover from my hangover. I felt like someone dropped a boulder onto my head--- several times -_-

I am never going to drink that much again.

When I first woke up with the splitting headache, I couldn't even get up from the bed. Youji tried to play nurse the whole time... even offered to give me a sponge bath -_-; I told him to leave me alone since he's done enough damage as it is. He reminded me that I chugged those drinks down all by myself.

...

Damn him when he's right.

I don't even know why I let myself go last night-- maybe it was the boredom. Maybe the air in this city got to me... ~shrugs~ Maybe Youji's presence is getting to me...

Well, when I could finally get up without my head exploding, I decided to take a walk around the neighborhood. People around here are interesting, needless to say. They were celebrating something, everyone was green and drunk. Though I've seen weirder people in Japan, I guess. After half an hour of looking inside the stores and such, I realized that Youji has been trailing after me the whole time. We were in a bookstore and he was pretending to read a magazine. I got out of his sight, fast, and watched him look around, completely confused. Then I snuck up behind him and twapped him over the head, demanding what did he think he was doing...

He claimed he was lonely and wanted to see what I was doing. Baka... Spent the rest of the day with him. Uneventful night, but that was all right. I can always appreciate the peace.

current mood: calm

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Sunday, March 16th, 2003
10:20 pm - Let me say it again.
Youji's an idiot.

He won't stop blaring that stupid rap music with the stupid lyrics. Grr. Why is he trying to irritate me on purpose -_- He was dancing to the music like an idiot and attempted to molest me.

I hope I didn't hit him too hard, though (even though he really did deserve it -_-). I helped him to his feet, mumbling an apology. He accused me of being such a crank and that I needed to loosen up. Like I remember how to do that. And like it really matters -_-

It's a little hard to finish my book with him moving around the room all the time, too. Damn. He's too distracting... well, he mixes good drinks, at least...

current mood: grumpy

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Saturday, March 15th, 2003
12:05 pm
I sat by Youji in the plane all the way over here... He was sick the entire time ._.; We warned him not to eat the plane food, but he wouldn't listen.

We're staying in the same hotel room, too...

Trying to get everyone away from the tourists brochures that's littered everywhere here -_-; We have a mission to do.

current mood: anxious

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Thursday, March 13th, 2003
10:35 pm
I just got done polishing up the Koneko before we leave for our... little extended mission overseas. I'm doing research on New Orleans, Louisiana as I write this. It's best to know the area where your hunting ground is going to be... makes the job move faster.

My teammates are anticipating this mission-- even though the reason for it seems kind of... strange, to me, the idea of traveling (accomodating paid-full by Persia and Kritiker, nonetheless) is making everyone a bit more energetic.

Last night's mission went well. It was all-right with Youji along-- though I would have preferred to have gone solo, if I had no choice, I would pick Youji as a partner. He's reliable and he seems to know how I like to do things and how I want to get them done. Our moves and thoughts never conflicted. It's like we unconciously synch up with each other. I guess that comes after years of working together... You get to know your teammates quite well.

current mood: accomplished

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Wednesday, March 12th, 2003
10:04 pm
[friends only-- ooc: that means Weiss can only read the entry, right? ^^;]

Mission tonight.

It should have been only me going, but Yohji thought he should accompany me. He said I'll never know when I need someone to watch my back.

~shrugs~ I suppose.

Got to go now.

current mood: working

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Tuesday, March 11th, 2003
9:49 pm
[private entry]

I knew I couldn't take care of her, or should she be allowed to be around me with the life I lead. When she woke from that coma, I always thought we'd just go back to the way we were before... but that's not how things happened. Someone else had to take care of her, made sure she led an easy and normal life. So she'll turn out okay and not have to worry about having a killer for a big brother.

She seems pretty satisfied with the family she's living with now, and they seem to really care for her. I'm happy that she's happy...

She doesn't know anything about the life I lead with Weiss (though Sakura almost ruined that, that stupid girl -_- Good thing Manx made her shut up before she could tell Aya everything. God. Doesn't that girl have any brains? Anyways...). She just thinks I live with a couple of buddies and work at a flower shoppe. Which is good. I don't want her to be a part of my crappy life.

When I see her, though, I just wished I could tell her... She is my sister and I can't be as close to her as I should be... These visits are so hard... I never stay around for too long. I'm pushing her away from me... I know... but...

I suppose I really just don't deserve it, to allow someone to be near, close, and to care for me. I'll just put her in danger again. It's better this way... I deserve to be alone. Not loved.

current mood: blank

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9:36 pm - WTF.
Why in the world is Omi running around in a... really strange ensemble?

....

And running around is not a good idea for him. It just keeps flashing his ass-cheeks everywhere. I didn't know he wore thongs-- and that's far too much information that I ever needed about my own teammates.

What in the hell is going on around here?...

You know what. I don't even want to know.

Or maybe I do. Maybe I should interefere because I don't think I like where this is going. Maybe I should just let them make idiots out of themselves. Maybe it'll be an amusing turn of events in the end. Maybe I should just ignore them all.

current mood: aggravated

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Sunday, March 9th, 2003
10:13 pm - Heh.
I made Yohji do all the work today and I took the liberty of taking the day off. I just pretty much sat in the store all day, catching up on some books and keeping one eye on Yohji to make sure he didn't slack off.

Surprisingly enough, he didn't.

He never did say no to most of my orders.

Never even wondered why he would do what I said before.

And now I'm wondering why.

Oh well. Might as well just take advantage of it. Even though he was blaring annoyingly loud and bad music from his earphones. He did constantly threw me looks of silent pleading to lay off him once in awhile... Of course, I didn't. I'm not going to let him off easy for trying to sell me off to Schwarz. Not even his cute and charming looks are getting him out of this one.

Anyways, I decided to visit my sister tomorrow. It's been awhile..

current mood: calm

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Saturday, March 8th, 2003
10:29 pm - Icicle ass....
"I offered him to Schwarz as a sex toy in exchange for clothes and a car and Nagi and a sex tape and a blowjob from Schuldig and something about an onsen"

Hnn... At least I know I wasn't being exchanged for something cheap and stupid. But still...

I am sharpening my katana as we speak. I thought it needed to be refreshed a bit... make it shiny... And really sharp and pointy.

I wonder when Youji plans to come home? -_-...

I was looking for him a bit around this afternoon, to give him a piece of my mind. When I was coming back to the shop, the crowd of girls there were... they were screaming a lot and doing weird things, so I turned away and decided I just might go... somewhere quiet instead.

Ken came back, at least. Looks like he was refreshed by the break he took... Maybe I need a break -_-;

current mood: tired

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Friday, March 7th, 2003
5:34 pm
Told Omi he better not cause anymore "problems" at school-- he thinks I overlook his drug abuse just because I don't say anything. Last time that there was a parent-teacher conference, I had to pretend to be his father and Youji had to be his mother.

....

I think I still have a picture of Youji in Manx's clothing. I swear he enjoyed that a little too much. He was also a little too grabby and clingy as my "wife". I swear Omi's teacher probably thought we were the most dysfunctional, fucked up family in the world. I refuse to ever go through that again.

Even though Youji did have better legs for that miniskirt.

current mood: bored

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Wednesday, March 5th, 2003
4:45 pm - hmm.
I don't even know why Omi talked me into signing up on this. Did I ever give him the impression that I like to talk alot? -_-

Youji just went out to get my trenchcoat fixed-- last night, his wire went through it during our mission. I told him he should be relieved I didn't loose my arm, either. I would have killed him for that one.

The mission went well. I suppose. What else can I say? I didn't get a wink of sleep all night, of course. I heard Omi creeping around. Figured he'd snuck into bed with Youji. Thankfully, no other sort of noises came around after that. I needed the silence, even though I really rather not hear the echoes of my own thoughts. Since everything else feels so empty...

current mood: apathetic

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